Monday, July 11, 2011

Sexting Tips - How to Sext Her Into Bed

First, this is geared towards married men or men already in a relationship. Of course the principles will work for men in general wanting to get laid, but that is not something I am a huge advocate, but to each his own.

So often I hear men say or joke about how their women just don't seem to want to have sex like they did when they first met. This happens. The honeymoon phase wears off. It takes more to get the woman turned on. Ever made a move towards your girlfriend or wife to have her go a bit cold or tell you she is tired. She hates doing this, trust me, but she really doesn't feel like it. Does she not initiate or rarely initiate sex anymore? This is really a shame because it doesn't have to be this way, but I can tell you why.

Stress, day to day life gets in the way. A woman's desire sort of goes to sleep. They aren't going to just wake up all on their own, you are going to have to help her some. You need to wake her up.

Men can go from zero to 100 in just minutes because they are visually stimulated. I could walk out of the bedroom with panties on or just heels and my boyfriend would be sitting on ready. It would be instant because men are visually stimulated. This is not the case with women, we aren't visually stimulated.

You can send flowers or buy her gifts, but this isn't going to work either. She is touched and thinks it's sweet, but her carnal sex drive it will not awaken. A woman is stimulated by what she feels and imagines. Her erogenous zone is her mind. Her mind is her biggest sex organ.

What turns a woman on? A man is turned on by porn for the most part. A picture of a man with this raging hard on is not what gets a woman excited and dying to jump your bones. Have you ever read those crazy romance novels? I have. I am not a fan of them, but I will confess, I have become soaking wet from the language that is used in them and the pictures they create in my imagination.

So how to you do this by sexting? You stimulate her biggest sex organ, her mind, imagination and how she feels. By doing this you give her permission to open up her desires to you. Desires that may embarrass her or that she may find difficult to share. If you are the one stimulating her imagination and helping her create these pictures, yes by a few texts, you can turn your sex life around. You can have her dying to get her hands on you regardless.

I recently got a sext message from a guy who has read the sexting book. A few lines flipped my stressed out switch from off to on. He sent this one message. "I can't stop thinking about you this morning". I replied "Why" Now he could have been crude, or highly sexual, but he didn't. He played with my imagination and let me lead the fantasy from there after a few texts. He replied to my why with this. "Your looked delicious in my shirt this morning".

I won't share the rest of this conversation, but let's just say, it escalated. He opened the door and gave me permission so to speak to be bad. If you don't think you can text your woman into bed, I got news for you, you can. Just not like you may think. Sexting tips for men are far different than sexting tips for women, trust me on this one.

Text her into bed tonight.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back

I coach mostly women, I won't lie. I have helped many get their ex boyfriends back by helping them understand how men think. So it's a given I suppose that I already know how women think, plus my ex boyfriend just got me back, so I suppose I can shed a little light here for you.

Generally speaking, I believe exes are exes for a reason, but if you want to know how to get your ex girlfriend back, I will tell you how my ex boyfriend did it.

I broke up with him. He lost his job, he was smothering me to death, and he was holding onto me for dear life. I cut all contact and if he dared to contact, lets say I was less than nice. He was driving me crazy.

So he had to give up or so I thought. He eventually respected my requests and left me alone. He took that time to think about things. He could have said I was cruel to cut him lose at his worst time in his life, but he didn't. He took that time to understand the dynamics and why it panicked me so bad and why I couldn't be a stand by your man woman.

You see, it goes back to the beginning of time. Men are hunters and providers, women are nurturers etc. My survival instinct kicked in and I did not see him as a suitable mate. Your issue may be different and not even close to ours, but stay with me here.

With all the feminist crap and all going on, and I am not knocking it, don't get me wrong. I am queen of independence, but it confuses our God given roles. Basically we women have needs that we want met, the main one being we want to feel safe with you. There are others of course, but safe and protected are high on the list.

Women grieve heavy in the beginning and while I suggest giving her space in the beginning, you can't wait too long to make your move. When a woman moves on, she moves on. She doesn't look back, because she reaches a point where instinct kicks in and she wants a mate that comes after her.

My ex got his crap together and showed up 5 months later. He would send a ping here and there but stopped driving me crazy. It gave me time to process and when he came back, he had fixed what was wrong and was in a place to listen to what I needed from him. Funny thing happened too during our time apart. I never really thought much about him. I was good with him being gone. I wasn't crying and thought, really thought I had done the best thing. But, and here is the but, I didn't really know how strongly I did feel. I had no clue. He had to remind me.

That is what you have to do. Figure out what it is that made her not feel safe, fix it, wait and come back and remind her.

I have to give my ex this credit as well. In his mind he never gave up. His attitude remained positive that he would have me back one day. I think attitude has a lot to do with is success at it. That and his courage that I could have shot him down. He showed up unexpected, completely caught me off guard. I could have cussed him out and that is truly how I would predict it go down, but it didn't. I hugged him instead and the rest is history in the makings.

He never tried to make me feel bad, he never used emotional blackmail on me, he took it like a man and waited for the timing to be right. If you love her, you have to be patient to get her back. No manipulation, no attacks, no making her feel guilt. Those things won't win her back.

HOW TO GET YOUR EX GIRLFRIEND BACK

If you are serious about getting your ex girlfriend back, please visit here.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Nice Guys Finish Last

Oh the times I have heard that statement. Nice guys finish last. Why is it that this seems to be the general opinion? I hear it from nice guys all the time. Women would rather be with a man that treats her like crap, hits her, talks her down than a guy who treats her good. I can see some justification in this, yes I can. I see it too in some women, but those aren't the kind of women you want, trust me. Think about it. A woman that allows a man to treat her bad is in a way just as responsible for it as the man treating her bad. Do you really want a woman that has no more love for herself than this? She needs some help that you probably can't give her. Some may slap me for this, but sorry, women have control over how they are treated. They don't have to accept this bad guys into their lives.

So that being said, maybe you nice guys aren't really looking for the nice girls? Is that a possibility? Do you have all these standards in place such as she has to be this height, this weight, she has to be this, she has to be that etc. Are you missing some of the good girls with your criteria or high expectations?

I am a part of few online communities. One where they train the nice guys to be players or pick up artist. Now I know many look down on this, but a funny thing happens to these guys going through this training. They learn what goes on in a woman's mind and they learn how to push her emotional buttons to trigger attraction. Some call it game playing. Bottom line. I have met quite a few of these guys that went through this so called bogus training and let me tell you, they did get it. Not "it", but they finally understood how women form and keep an attraction for a man. A lot of these men have met and now have long term lasting relationships as opposed to a lot of one night stands. They learn how to be a nice guy with that extra edge.

I deal with mostly women so let me tell you why they say nice guys finish last. The attraction isn't usually there with the nice guys. They talk about going on dates, what a nice guy he is but there is no click. Why is this, why can't they like a nice guy? Could this nice guy not really understand what it is that creates attraction in a woman. Trust me, you can be a nice guy and still drive a girl wild. Do nice guys finish last? No, they don't.

Monday, June 13, 2011

My Girlfriend Wants a Break

If your girlfriend wants a break, I only know one way to put this too you and that is straight up. There is a break up ahead if you don't give it to her. If you are saying to your friends or searching this "My girlfriend wants a break", there is trouble ahead.

When your girlfriend wants a break or asks for space what she is saying is she is feeling smothered by you. You are possibly heading somewhere too fast or too soon. I hate to say this part too, but sometimes another guy has caught her attention and she wants the space to explore this but doesn't want to tell you. Cop out? Maybe.

Six months ago I told my boyfriend of 6 months I wanted space. Some of the things he was doing was constantly texting me, wanting to talk every night on the phone, which meant my life as I knew it before was being interrupted. I like my nights out with the girls. He didn't mind that so much, but he wanted to talk to me and would call or text while I was out. I drove me crazy. Thing is he was a great guy.

My love language was different. I need space, I need my other life outside of him and his clinging to me was making me feel quilt and I felt reponsible for his happiness. It became not so fun and it started to bleed over to when we were together.

I asked for space. I explained to him I wouldn't always answer texts or calls if I was working or out having a one on one with my girlfriends, but would call him back. I wanted him to trust me on this. We want to be trusted just like you guys do. By him continuing to push, I didn't feel trusted.

I broke up with him because he wasn't getting it. For the first month after the break up, he kept on pushing. He was coming from a place of his pain. He wanted answers. He didn't understand. The more he did this, the more he validated for me that breaking up with him was a good thing.

About month number 2 or 3, he started stopping contact after eventually I had to get pretty rough and threaten to block him or report him for harassment. I understood he was acting from a place of emotion and not logic, but it wasn't getting him anywhere, he was still smothering me and not respecting my wishes and decision.

Month 4 he stopped all contact. I sort of just forgot about him, but often thought of how much I knew he loved me. Still I pushed it out of my mind as I did not want to go down that road again of having to ask him for a break and fighting that battle again. I was convinced I made the right choice to end it.

Month 6, he shows up after no contact for over 60 days, none, nada zilch. When I saw him all I remembered was the good times to be honest and I was very happy to see him. Very unexpected on my part. His emotions had time to calm. He was more able to see it clearly from my point and I was more clearly to see it from his.

We are talking again. We made a stride towards one another. Had he not crowded me in the fist place and given me, his girlfriend a break, we would very possibly never broke up to start with.

Moral of this story, if your girlfriend asks for space or if you are saying to others my girlfriend wants a break, give it to her. Let her miss you because chances are good she will. Don't question her about it, just accept it and give it to her. You stand a much better chance of keeping her if you do. If you fight it, you will lose her.

So if your girlfriend wants a break, take the time to understand the whys of this, take the precautions to stop that break up that is ahead.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Love Systems Review

I research many of the dating products out there and recently landed on a forum called "The Attraction Forum". Wow, is all I can say. There are guys there of all ages giving excellent advice and support. The product in my opinion are very realistic and I wish all men would put forth the effort that these guys do to up their dating game.

This isn't like the Don Juan group that seems to promote downgrading women. These guys know their stuff and teach guys how to approach, meet, and keep women. The forum is free and packed with useful information.

The best seller is an e-book called Magic Bullets. It's the basics and well worth the investment especially to those nice guys who get caught in the friend zone.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Texting a Woman - What You Don't Know Will Hurt You

Texting a woman is right at your fingertips and it's the most powrful dating tool you have.. If you are like 95% of the men out there, you are probably screwing it up. When it comes to impacting their dating lives, most men are clueless.

I am going to be blunt about this texting thing you men do. I am a moderator on a women's forum. Hundreds and hundreds of women from all over the world have the same view when it comes to men and their texting techniques, they are clueless. When one gets it right, we rant and rave. It may be months down the road and we are still carrying those great text messages around in our phones. We save them.

Men, when texting women are just doing lame communications at most. They aren't engaging the woman or her playful nature. If you are sending anything close to the following text messages, you may wish to carry on reading.

* Good Morning
* Good Morning Sexy
* Good Night
* How is your day
* Hope you are having a good day
* How are you today
* What are you doing
* How is such and such
* Don't work to hard
* I am doing such and such
* I had a good time last night
* Thinking of you

There is nothing in the above messages to engage a woman and build up her attraction. It's usesless ramblings.. Unless a woman is totally smitten with a guy, these messages will just make her eyes roll.

What you don't know is this. While you are sending her those lame messages, there could very well be a guy who is rocking her world with the right words and techniques. It's the guy of mystery, the one that engages our imagination that push our buttons. Some guys can literally leave us hanging on their words.

It's the guy that teases us, banters with us that we find thrilling. It's a simple thing to do, just pay attention and play off of her. Suzanne is a care free, no nonsense southern woman. Her date from the preceding night added one word to his "I had a nice time last night" and made all the difference in the world. He opened the text with Scarlett, as in O'hara. What woman would not want to be seen that way.

She replied calling him Rhett, as in Butler. The flirty play began. That guy knew how to interact with her and push her buttons. She also knew he had paid attention to her. That is hot, to have a man really pay attention. Talk about stroking a woman's ego.

So when texting a woman, leave the small talk conversations out of it. If you can't flirt and be mischievous and make her smile, put down the cell phone, otherwise you are just throwing cold water on top of the fire. You like to condition her to where when she sees it is you texting, she gets excited, and her heart skips a beat. You want to be the guy who she saves his messages.

It's not just the words you use, it really is the strategies as well. Learn how to get her excited about you with flirty text messages.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Calling and Texting Women You Like - This is Critical

When texting or calling a girl you like it's critical that you don't go over board and kill her attraction. Your instinct when you meet a girl that you really like is to reach out and touch her. You want to communicate with her because face it, it feels good. If you want to build attraction though and an emotional connection when texting a girl you like, it's very important that you go easy boy.

An example. Cindy met Don. They really hit if off. Don got Cindy's number and asked her out. They had the first date and there was some mutual chemistry, lots of it. Next morning Don sends Cindy a harmless text. "Good Morning Beautiful". Cindy thinks aw, how sweet. 5 minutes later, he texts her what a great time he had. She still thinks aw, how sweet.

The day goes on, Don sends more texts, tries to engage her in conversation. Wow, Cindy is now wondering if Don isn't maybe a little needy, maybe even desperate. That night he texts her "Good night Sweetie". Her attraction just dropped a few degrees. Women do like to be challenged. When you come running out of the gate full speed ahead, well you took away any challenge or intrigue she might have felt.

She stills gives him the benefit of the doubt and sees him again, but to her horror, the texts just keep getting closer and closer together. The funny sexy guy has turned annoying on her. When texting a girl you like, you want to be flirty, you want to be fun and you don't want to be annoying.

I know you want her to know you are interested and you think those texts are showing her you like her. The fact is all they are showing her is you don't have a life and you are boring. She starts to not answer all of Don's texts, then he starts questioning her. "Are you upset?" "Do you not want to talk to me today?" Texts that show him in a very unattractive not so confident light.

Fast forward a couple of weeks. Cindy has the talk. She tells Don she just wants to be friends. She tells her girlfriends that if he would have just not texted her so much, maybe she would have given him a chance.

Had Don known some really good flirty techniques, this story might have a different ending. Unfortunately, Don is off to repeat the same mistake with the next girl he likes. Texting is a huge attraction killer, but it can be an equally destructive buzz killer. When texting a girl you like, less really is more.

I have swooned and been swooned by some really skilled texters. I have hung on their every text and I have also cringed at the sound of the phone.