Oh the times I have heard that statement. Nice guys finish last. Why is it that this seems to be the general opinion? I hear it from nice guys all the time. Women would rather be with a man that treats her like crap, hits her, talks her down than a guy who treats her good. I can see some justification in this, yes I can. I see it too in some women, but those aren't the kind of women you want, trust me. Think about it. A woman that allows a man to treat her bad is in a way just as responsible for it as the man treating her bad. Do you really want a woman that has no more love for herself than this? She needs some help that you probably can't give her. Some may slap me for this, but sorry, women have control over how they are treated. They don't have to accept this bad guys into their lives.
So that being said, maybe you nice guys aren't really looking for the nice girls? Is that a possibility? Do you have all these standards in place such as she has to be this height, this weight, she has to be this, she has to be that etc. Are you missing some of the good girls with your criteria or high expectations?
I am a part of few online communities. One where they train the nice guys to be players or pick up artist. Now I know many look down on this, but a funny thing happens to these guys going through this training. They learn what goes on in a woman's mind and they learn how to push her emotional buttons to trigger attraction. Some call it game playing. Bottom line. I have met quite a few of these guys that went through this so called bogus training and let me tell you, they did get it. Not "it", but they finally understood how women form and keep an attraction for a man. A lot of these men have met and now have long term lasting relationships as opposed to a lot of one night stands. They learn how to be a nice guy with that extra edge.
I deal with mostly women so let me tell you why they say nice guys finish last. The attraction isn't usually there with the nice guys. They talk about going on dates, what a nice guy he is but there is no click. Why is this, why can't they like a nice guy? Could this nice guy not really understand what it is that creates attraction in a woman. Trust me, you can be a nice guy and still drive a girl wild. Do nice guys finish last? No, they don't.
Showing posts with label do nice guys finish last. Show all posts
Showing posts with label do nice guys finish last. Show all posts
Monday, June 20, 2011
Friday, July 2, 2010
The Nice Guy
On a ladies forum, there is a discussion about nice guys and what advice we women would give them. Wanted to share a few of the posts here. We really do like nice guys.
A woman who is secure within herself and truthful to herself, does not respect a man who says YES to everything, as that reflects lack of personality . A real man has feelings, thoughts and principles of his own and should not ignore his real self
You're a nice guy, you're not gonna give off that 'I'm only interested in sex'-vibe anyway. But a girl's looking for a lover, not a male friend. You do need to create physical attraction and convince her that there's sexual compatability. Without some sexual tension during the date, a girl might have a nice dinner with you, but she won't consider taking you as her mate. Good flirting includes some subtle naughty humor.
Many nice guys think when it comes to women, they have the short straw. They see tons of confident, cocky males getting the woman. However, the truth is - nice guys have the winning edge. Most women will give nice guys a chance, precisely because they display more respect to a woman, they're better mannered and they have values that are so appealing to a woman.
Where the nice guys fall down however is in lack of confidence and poor self esteem.
My advice to a nice guy is to feel the fear and do it anyway. Don't be shy to make the first move. If you're interested in a woman, well please show it. Chances are you'll get success.
And if a woman does happen to reject you, please don't take it personally, and allow that one rejection to cause you to head back into your shell.
We LIKE nice guys!
A woman who is secure within herself and truthful to herself, does not respect a man who says YES to everything, as that reflects lack of personality . A real man has feelings, thoughts and principles of his own and should not ignore his real self
You're a nice guy, you're not gonna give off that 'I'm only interested in sex'-vibe anyway. But a girl's looking for a lover, not a male friend. You do need to create physical attraction and convince her that there's sexual compatability. Without some sexual tension during the date, a girl might have a nice dinner with you, but she won't consider taking you as her mate. Good flirting includes some subtle naughty humor.
Many nice guys think when it comes to women, they have the short straw. They see tons of confident, cocky males getting the woman. However, the truth is - nice guys have the winning edge. Most women will give nice guys a chance, precisely because they display more respect to a woman, they're better mannered and they have values that are so appealing to a woman.
Where the nice guys fall down however is in lack of confidence and poor self esteem.
My advice to a nice guy is to feel the fear and do it anyway. Don't be shy to make the first move. If you're interested in a woman, well please show it. Chances are you'll get success.
And if a woman does happen to reject you, please don't take it personally, and allow that one rejection to cause you to head back into your shell.
We LIKE nice guys!
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Do Nice Guys Really Finish Last
Drama Queens excluded, yes women like nice guys. We just don't like doormats. Doormats meaning the men that try to be what they think we want. Confidence is the key word here. A man who knows what he wants, knows himself and likes himself. The man that makes us feel he can hold his own with grace. That is the man that makes a woman feel safe. A nice guy can be these things. So do nice guys finish last? No, I think not.
Then there are the men that try to sell themselves. They tell you all of their features and benefits. They tell you how they know how to treat a woman. Most of us women already learned not to put too much stock into a man's words, but to watch their actions and how they treat us. If they say they are going to call and don't, well the action said way more than the words. The action said we really aren't that important.
If that is the message you are trying to convey, fine, some drama queen will love you. Go find her. They are everywhere. I am writing this assuming you want a healthy stable relationship. A smart, emotionally balanced woman will not like a jerk, she will go with the nice guy providing he can stimulate her on an emotional level.
So how do you attract these smarter, balanced women? Do you have to play games? Well maybe not games, but being overly available and calling her 12 times a day and texting lame messages will begin to annoy her for sure. Please tell me you don't text her good morning beautiful, or sexy or something similar shortly after meeting her. Most of us roll our eyes at that because it happens all the time. You are not standing out. If you are going to send a text, by all means be creative and witty. Don't be like all the other guys.
Be a nice guy, but don't be one of the nice guys that finish last.
There are many creative ways to meet and attract women and still be a nice guy and not finish last. There is online dating, there is the cell phone which is a huge tool for you dating life. What you text and what you say when you use that phone can make or break an attraction. Learn to use these tools so that you will not be one of those nice guys that finish last.
Then there are the men that try to sell themselves. They tell you all of their features and benefits. They tell you how they know how to treat a woman. Most of us women already learned not to put too much stock into a man's words, but to watch their actions and how they treat us. If they say they are going to call and don't, well the action said way more than the words. The action said we really aren't that important.
If that is the message you are trying to convey, fine, some drama queen will love you. Go find her. They are everywhere. I am writing this assuming you want a healthy stable relationship. A smart, emotionally balanced woman will not like a jerk, she will go with the nice guy providing he can stimulate her on an emotional level.
So how do you attract these smarter, balanced women? Do you have to play games? Well maybe not games, but being overly available and calling her 12 times a day and texting lame messages will begin to annoy her for sure. Please tell me you don't text her good morning beautiful, or sexy or something similar shortly after meeting her. Most of us roll our eyes at that because it happens all the time. You are not standing out. If you are going to send a text, by all means be creative and witty. Don't be like all the other guys.
Be a nice guy, but don't be one of the nice guys that finish last.
There are many creative ways to meet and attract women and still be a nice guy and not finish last. There is online dating, there is the cell phone which is a huge tool for you dating life. What you text and what you say when you use that phone can make or break an attraction. Learn to use these tools so that you will not be one of those nice guys that finish last.
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