Thursday, May 27, 2010

Texting Blunders that Kill the Attraction

I know a woman who is queen of sorry's; constantly apologizing for who she is, sweet sweet woman though. You cannot do this in life, and especially not in texting. I am not talking about being late and not apologizing for it. I am talking about the incessant use of sorrys to be accepted by others. This is just ugly in text and makes you look very weak. What if instead of saying sorry you actually said, "I am pathetic, please like me" or "please accept me, I am your personal slave."

Would this kind of person seem attractive to you? Would you want to be friends or lovers with this person? 90% of the time, when you use "Sorry" it is inappropriate. So stop it!!

The "just kidding or also known as jk, is just as pathetic.This is something that took me forever to learn, simply because I was so afraid of losing someone's approval. Think about how many times you have said something funny, slightly rude, to be playful but pulled it back. You know what you said... the horribly weak comment, "just kidding." It is soft weak and slightly repulsive. Why do you say this?? Why is nearly everything you write

tempered with weak comments like "just kidding" or "sorry about that?" Just cut to the chase and say, "I am really weak and I need to be approved of, so every time we interact I am going to apologize for my existence."


Jen: Hey, I just got my schedule I am free Friday and Monday

Mike: You want to go out Friday?? Don't you have a date that night?

Jen: Yeah... with you! Where are you going to take me?

Mike: Take you??? You asked Meee! I think you should be taking me out to dinner!

Jen: I only buy dinner for cute guys, not rude ones! JK

Did you catch that? That little JK at the end of the text? This is like a dingy towed behind a yacht. Jen was doing so well too! It is as if she was pumping up the tire of interest and pow, she let all the air out with the pin of JK. These are softeners that communicate you are playing. JK and Sorry communicates that you are weak and unsure of yourself. The last thing you want to do in text or in person.

Now the lol. Word of caution, don't overuse lol and =). If you do they lose their effectiveness. There is a guy on Facebook that puts this after every comment. It becomes like an obnoxious giggle after a while; no substance, just space filler. It is almost as obnoxious as me using exclamation points all the time! OR TYPING IN CAPS ALL THE TIME.

When texting girls, remember it is not about getting her to like you, it's more about challenging her. If you can challenge her, you will have her undivided attention.

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Texting is the number one tool in the dating world now, that can't be denied. Even baby boomers use it. There are many skills you can develop with this tool that can charge your dating life up to exciting levels.

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Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Top Texting Tips for Texting Girls

One of the best things about texting a girl is that you have time to craft what you are going to say. Put extra time in here and think about what it is that you want to say. Don't just shoot off some senseless text like "Good Morning". Take an extra minute and plan what kind of response you want to get and pose your words accordingly.

Texting is a conversation in slow motion. This is the best way to handle it. In other words, don't be sitting there ready to fire off a response immediately after receiving a text. Texting back immediately is a huge texting no no. It conveys need and to be needy is the biggest dating buzz kill. It makes you think seriously does he have his phone clued on, I mean really, is he even taking it into the bathroom. Does he not have a life? Does he hang on my every word. So not attractive.

Another big texting tip for dating is if you don't get a reply to a text you sent, don't send another one. This shows desperation. If I don't reply usually I am busy. I will reply later, sometimes a day later. This builds the attraction actually. Silence is very powerful. The imagination will generate many scenarios as to what the other person is doing during this silence. Then when the reply does come, she is relieved and adrenaline is released. A bit of an emotional roller coaster ride you take her on.

Think long term satisfaction, not instant gratification. Texting is a way to keep some one at a distance. Keep a person at a distance long enough and human nature takes over. The person being kept at a distance now wants to move closer. When texting a girl, remember anticipation is the key. Make sure you build on this anticipation and you will can build a deep attraction when texting girls.

I have a few guys in my phone. Most girls do. Out of all the guys that I have had in my phone, I can honestly say that very few of them had mastered this skill. The ones that had got my attention. This is universally true with women. With such an important part in our dating skills, shouldn't you learn to utilize text messaging to the max?

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Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Texting a Girl, What Message are You Sending?

Let's say you text a girl good morning. What she feels when you do this is "wow" he must really be into me to be texting a girl first thing in the morning. If you do this every morning, she is going to come to expect it, or she could very well tire of it. Most girls like an occasional "Good Morning" text, but less is more really. Don't do it every day, she will see you as too available, and nothing kills attraction like being too available.

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When texting girls, also what are you saying. Are you calling her beautiful? Using the same old lines we hear over and over. If I get one more "Hello Beautiful", I personally just might scream. We girls roll our eyes and think, can't he be original? Is this the best he can do?

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When texting a girl, don't go overboard. Don't do it too often. When you are constantly texting, again she sees you as maybe desperate, needy and too availble. Girls like guys, enjoy a challenge. Be unpredictable, this puts her on that roller coaster ride of adrenaline surges. If she never knows when or what to expect with your text messages, the attraction tension in heightened.

When texting girls, be fun, flirty, and a bit unpredictable. Keep her guessing. Make her smile, and be original. Put some thought into what you say and when you say it. If you have a great text message in your mind that you want to send, wait, hold onto it. In other words, don't be so anxious to hit the send button.

Dating now is evolving. Text messaging is the biggest tool available to gain and heighten attraction. I have seen guys turn their dating life around by learning to use this tool to their advantage. Knowing the buttons and triggers of women and how to push them via text messaging can triple your dating success.

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