Sunday, November 28, 2010

How Texting a Girl Can Backfire and Turn Her Off

Texting being the biggest dating tool available can be used to turn a girl on, but if used incorrectly, it can be a huge turnoff. Texting a girl should always be done in moderation. There is a such thing as overkill. This applies also to calling. The key here to remember is less is more.

I am going to share a story here with you about Jack and Diane. They met at happy hour one afternoon and hit it off. Jack got Diane's number and texted her the next day. Jack immediately jumped in and started texting her Good Morning everyday, even before their first date. Diane thought it sweet and really didn't think nothing of it.

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Fast forward, they start dating. They hit it off, things are good. Jack steps up the texting, now not only is it Good Morning, but he is sharing bits and pieces of his day, staying in constant contact with Diane. Now there are so many women out there complaining that their guys don't text or call enough, so what is the problem here?

Let's go forward a couple more months. Jack and Diane are still dating, but Diane has slowed down on her responses to Jack. He texts her while she is at work, while she is shopping, it's just too much. Diane goes out with the girls. Jack texts her half the night and she can't relax. She starts ignoring him, so he calls. She has to assure him everything is ok, but she would like to enjoy her evening.

Diane is now frustrated with the way the relationship is going. She feels like Jack doesn't trust in what they have, as he seems to need to keep in touch constantly. She starts seeing this as clingy needy behavior. She doesn't feel like Jack trusts her anymore although he claims he does.

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Diane cuts her phone off for an entire weekend. Jack has pushed her to the limit and killed her attraction. Jack sees his behavior as considerate. He doesn't understand he took away all of the challenge, all of the mystery by being to available with his constant texting.

A challenge and some mystery are what builds attraction with women. There are texting techniques you can use to build the attraction but there is a such thing as overkill. When texting a girl, if you want it to last or you want to keep her, remember less is more. Click Here to get over 101 proven flirty text messages

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Top 4 Mistakes Men Make in Bed

1. Asking Her What Turns Her On

Talk to women any day and you will find their biggest complaint is communication, men just don't really know how. Asking her seems logical right? Wrong. We appreciate the effort, really we do, but for most of us, opening up like that is not an easy task. We want a man who leads, who pays attention and knows what to do. We do understand you can't read minds, but we know somewhere inside that if you pay really close attention to the signals of our body, you will learn what turns us on without asking.

If you just ask her "What turns you on?" you might get a good answer. She might even like it when you ask her. But there is a strong chance that, on some unconscious level, she will feel a weakness in you and be disappointed.

She will be less turned on by the sexual experience if she feels weakness. The key is to get her to open up and get her to show you without you asking.

2. Using Techniques to Please Her

Techniques are great, but again, a woman's orgasm really is directly connected with her brain. The problem with these techniques is that all women are different. What works on one, will not work on another. A woman can tell when you are just focused on a mastering a technique. This means one thing to her, you aren't focused on her but on what you are doing at the time. She then feels pressure to reward you for your efforts. We often fake orgasms at times like this just to get you to stop. It makes us very uncomfortable to have a man doing some robotic thing hoping to bring us to orgasm.

3. Not Understanding the Sexual Language of Women

Sexual communication is foreign to most men. Women give off all kinds of signals, but you aren't understanding her most of the time. Have you ever been going down on a woman and for some reason you feel she may be up there sleeping? Have you ever had a woman getting really excited and she pushed you away or stopped you? This is happening because again, you aren't paying attention and she is frustrated. If you can learn how to listen to a woman's body and really pay attention, she is capable of having an incredible sexual experience. Tons of signals are being sent out when a woman is close to orgasm. Men misinterpret them for many reason, one of which is he may be looking for the standard orgasm response. Screaming, moaning,what ever he has encountered before. Not all women are alike and I can't stress this enough. Some orgasm quietly and you have to pay attention to her breathing. Others thrash around. Some are still. It is critical to be able to read her sexual language and all women speak it differently.

4. Not Doing Anything To Fix It

The 4th and biggest mistake of all. If you don't do anything to fix it. Women will stay and remain faithful to you if you are an incredible lover, don't underestimate the power of it. If you aren't doing it, chances are somewhere out there is a man who will take the time and effort to take her to higher sexual levels.

Are you the best lover she ever had? Are you sure? You can be.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Before You Text a Girl Good Morning

If you have a new girl in your life and are thinking of sending her a good morning text first thing to consider is this. Is she as into you as you are her? When we girls get a good morning text, we know in that instant you are into us. We think, wow he is thinking of me in the morning, this guy really likes me. You have lost some of your mystery appeal here. She now knows she is in. Once a girl knows this, the fun is pretty much over. Do you really want her to know yet that you are thinking of her even when you awake in the morning?

Another thing about texting a girl good morning is you are setting up an expectation that is pretty high. If you are both into one another and it is early on, she is going to start expecting it everyday. It lays ground work for issues ahead. Do you want to be expected to text her every morning? What happens if you stop feeling it for her or miss a few mornings? I will tell you what happens. Women analyze. She will start worrying if you might be getting distant. There is a good chance she may cause some drama. It's like when you tell a girl you are going to call her and you don't. What does she do? You know the answer to that one I am sure.

Last but not least is texting a girl good morning is pretty boring. It doesn't do much to build attraction. It's sweet, but sweet will not make her feel it for you. To build attraction with texting a girl you need to convey mystery and be a challenge. Texting is a huge tool that can be used to build attraction if you do it with skill.

Any guy can send the same old boring messages that we get everyday. Learn to stand out and escalate the attraction to a higher level through texting.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

She is Distant - What Happened - What to Do

Ever been dating a woman maybe a few weeks, maybe a few months and all of a sudden she is distant. You can tell in her voice she is less than thrilled when you call, she may stop answering some of your texts and worse she canceled a date. You can feel her pulling away and you don't know why.

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Chances are she is not feeling the attraction she felt earlier. Attraction for a woman is a tricky thing. They like to feel secure, but at the same time they do like mystery. You might want to ask yourself have you been smothering her or maybe being too predictable.

Men often wonder why women love jerks. This is not really true, it's just there is something that jerks can do that the nice guys struggle with. They create attraction. They are not so easy to get and are far from predictable. If you are texting her relentlessly, telling her you miss her and other mushy stuff, this really is a turn off. We start to think, oh boy, if I don't return the sentiments, he is not going to be happy. Then we feel responsible for your happiness. This is huge in killing attraction.

I will share a story about attraction gone south. Tim met Jen. They hit it off, started dating. Tim immediately started texting her everyday. Good Morning, Good Night, sharing parts of his day with her. He sent her flowers. She was flattered at first. How sweet. Weeks go by, he continues. Jen is starting to get bored. She calls me and doesn't know what to do, she feels smothered and is starting to see him as a friend. The more she pulls away, the more he comes after her. She is distant. Relationship dies before it even gets off the ground because Tim wouldn't give her time to miss him, the key element in building attraction.

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If you feel she is distant, don't go after her even harder. Give her some space and time to miss you. Don't ask her for reassurance, this makes you look needy and will kill the attraction even more. If you text her every morning, miss one. Mirror her level of commitment. This shows her you will not allow her to be the center of your universe. This is wildly attractive to a woman.

It's like flowers on Valentines day. You get them for her because it is expected. If you are relentless and predictable, she will come to expect it. A woman would much rather get flowers at random than on a day of celebration. It means so much more.

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Thursday, November 4, 2010

Why and How Women Fake Orgasms

Women faking orgasms is very common. I often hear men say she should just tell them how to please her. Truth is though, this isn't really something a woman feels comfortable doing. She knows it may take her longer and she fears this will turn a man off. She is also scared you may see her as a freak.

With the porn out there, it puts some pressure on women. In any porn flick, the women are in these insane positions such as ankles around the neck, or contorted into a pretzel, yet she is screaming her head off in ecstasy. This really isn't realistic. A woman is often self conscious and to have her legs over her head does not make her feel attractive, trust me. She is thinking of her belly and how it might look to you. If you are behind her, she make think her rear is too wide. These things get in the way of our orgasms. An orgasm with a woman starts in her mind.

Just like you don't want to disappoint her, she doesn't want to disappoint you. This is the main reason women fake orgasms. She is thinking of you and not her. Women by nature want to please you. They know how sensitive men are when it comes to his performance. It's often just easier faking an orgasm than risking hurting your feelings.

I know a lot of men who would say their women faking an orgasm is out of the question. Many a man has been fooled by this illusion. Women do fake it. They can actually contract their vaginal muscles and breath and moan and groan just like the porn stars do it. You roll over thinking you are the man and she rolls over frustrated thinking she just put on the show of her life. She has dug herself in and now she doesn't know how to fix it so that you will know how to satisfy her.

If you are having sex with your woman and she is panting and screaming like a banshee ape, there really is a good chance she is faking it. If she really is having an orgasm, her heart starts beating really fast when orgasm begins, she gets flushed, and her breathing is shallow and fast. A woman's nipples go completely erect during an orgasm. This is a little fact they never will share with you because then you would know their secret.

All women fake orgasms at some point, there are few who haven't. We talk about it often with our girlfriends. It's a very common topic among women. They don't feel safe to open up because they are too worried about what you may think. If you want to satisfy her and assure she doesn't have to fake it, this may take opening your mind to the fact that you may not know what you think you know.

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Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Online Dating Email-The Subject Line Is Critical

In my experience with online dating, that first email is your opportunity for a first impression. The subject line of an online dating email is her next impression after your profile, which is also critical. Don't underestimate the power this simple thing holds as to weather she will consider you as a candidate or not.

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I am an advocate of online dating. I have done it and met some really great guys, even had a couple of long term relationships, not to mention the friendships I have had too. Don't get me wrong, I have met some crazy guys, just like I am sure you have met some crazy women. It's a numbers game, but if you are dating online, you increase your chances of finding a companion by leaps and bounds.

I have seen many things in a subject line of an online dating email. First there is the "no subject". This does nothing to spark interest. You need an interesting subject line, one that stands out in her inbox. Quality women get a lot of emails. If they open up their mail and see "No subject", they think you didn't put forth too much effort.

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Then there is the ridiculous subject line that almost all the guys use. It's something like "Hey Sexy", "Nice pic", "Hi beautiful", etc... You get the drift right? When we open our mail, we often have many of these that are so alike it's just down right discouraging. We roll our eyes and say, "Oh Boy, here we go again".

So what do you put in the subject line of an online dating email then? Find something in her profile and use that to come up with a subject line. Be witty and humorous. Let her know you actually read her profile. Stay away from anything sexual and don't comment on her appearance of good looks. Attraction for a woman starts in her mind. Stimulate her mind.

Another good trick is if you exchange several emails which if she is a quality woman she may want to do, change the subject line with every few emails. This piques her interest. If she opens up her mail and finds a different subject line every time, you start to stand out from the rest. You are more interesting and creative than the others.

The subject line of an online dating email is just one of the many important things to consider. There is the profile, email content, profile picture and the list goes on and on. To triple your chances of getting dates online, invest in learning what works and what doesn't, I think you would be surprised. Knowledge is power.

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