Thursday, September 30, 2010

Midset for Picking Up Girls in Bars

Girls don't go to bars looking to pick up guys as a rule. They go out to have fun with their girlfriends, have a few drinks and get dressed up and wear the new pair of shoes they just bought at the mall. They know they will get hit on and they usually sit around with their chick friends and make fun of all the lame pick up lines that guys use. Next time just look at that table of giggling girls. You can bet they are sharing some lame guy story. If you really want to pick up girls in bars or just get their number, you have to stand out. Not always easy to do.

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Their defenses are already up because of the other guys that have been hitting on them. The competition is fierce when you are attempting to pick up girls in bars. It's like 3 to 1, guys on girls. This means that before you even approached there were probably others before you and she knows there will be others when you are gone. Her defenses are already up and it's really hard to stand out in the crowd when her mindset is already made up that men are all creeps.

A guy would love to be able to call his buddies the next day and tell how he picked up this really hot chick. Guys brag about picking up girls in bars, no doubt. Keep in mind this is not usually the goal of the girl. She wants to be able to call her girls the next day and talk about how she met this really great, funny guy who was different from the rest. He got her phone number and now she is anticipating his call. The white horse story so to speak.

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In order to be successful with girls in bars, it is really important that you understand their mindset and how they think. They are emotional creatures and to be able to get past her guard, you really have to learn the skills of how to push those buttons. If you want to pick up a girls in bars, by all means it's possible with the right tools.

Do you blend in with all the other guys? Learn what makes a guy stand out above the rest and attract the girls. Click Here To Access the Dating Secrets Community

Monday, September 27, 2010

Online Dating Profile Advice for Men

Below is a Newsletter I received from Mimi Tanner, a well know author of relationship books for women. I thought it was interesting and I thought you guys should read it. A lot of truth in it. I am telling you again, lots of girls/women out there. What on earth is the problem? I hope to shed a little light. I am sure by the way that this does work both ways. Women do the below too.

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Many men feel that one of the most
important things they should tell
you in their online dating profiles
is that they have a sense of humor.

The trouble is, they feel that they
must be ADAMANT about it - they
must INSIST that they have one, in
case you don't believe them!

The more they insist, the less I
believe in their so-called sense
of humor!

Many men's online dating profiles
say something like this:

"I have an incredible sense of humor.
I really do, no matter what people
think. I'm like Woody Allen but
better. I'm telling you, my sense
of humor is fantastic, you freaking
hag!!"

Okay, I'm exaggerating, but here's
what I mean:

First of all, just because a man
says he has a sense of humor, that
does not mean that he really has one.
It doesn't mean he would even
recognize a Sense of Humor if
it bit him...

Second, I'm not sure why men think
that just because they say they
have a sense of humor, you're going
to believe it!

I believe it when they say they
have a dog; but when they say they
have a sense of humor and then they
feel the need to go one or two steps
further to INSIST that they have a
sense of humor, then I get suspicious!

One time, when I was looking
at guys' profiles in an online
dating site, I noticed one with a
photo that appealed to me. The man
sounded intelligent. His profile
was good.

However, he did make quite a point
that he had a sense of humor!! He
was SURE about that...

He also said, "I see the glass
as half full."

I had just read several profiles
which referred to how men "see the
glass" (zzzzzzzz). The "glass half
full or half empty" is already a
cliche, but I think that was one of
the suggestions this site made to
people as a way to describe themselves
in their profile. So I had already
read several profiles of men who
stated - of course - that they
see the glass as half full. (I
mean, any other answer is "wrong,"
because that would be "too negative"
even if it was honest...!)

This site just made it too easy
to shoot the guy a little note...
and since I wasn't trying to "find
a guy" but wanted some distraction,
I sent him a quick message.

I wrote, "I see the glass as spilled."

I also added, "That's a great picture!"
or some quick compliment on his photo.

The next day, this man wrote back
to me, "You see the glass as spilled
because of the people you surround
yourself with..."

Okay... so much for that sense of
humor!

Then he went on to tell me more about
WHY I see the glass as spilled and
how I can fix that. (Does he know
who I "surround myself with"?)

Then he added, "I'm sure your picture
is great too."

Oh, no! Strike two - the man feels
sorry for me. Well, yes, I do have
a very good picture (that was not
shown on the site by choice).

The photo comment wasn't a terrible
comment or a dealbreaker - it was
at least well intended - but the
man actually took my joke seriously
and then proceeded to give me advice.
He definitely didn't have the claimed
"sense of humor" - or not one that
would work for me.

That's one of the nice things about
online dating - you can prove to
yourself that what I'm telling
you is true - men do not respond
well to women who approach them
first.

When it doesn't matter, you can
be freer to test the Online Dating
waters and learn more about flirting
and about how men think.

It didn't matter how this man responded
since I wasn't trying to date the guy,
but it proved that when it comes
to online dating, men still respond
best when THEY approach YOU first.

It doesn't matter how wonderful you are,
at all - so don't let it get to your
ego if men misread you when you contact
them first!

Even if you turned out to be Jennifer
Lopez - most men are suspicious - and
they will assume that there must be
something "a-miss" about any woman who
"needs to" (they will infer) contact
a guy first!

Yes, that's their mistake - I know that.
But that IS the way it is. I didn't make
the biology! This is just the way it
works 99% of the time!

So my short-term dilemma was,
how should I respond to this man
without insulting his ego, the
one that thinks he has a great
sense of humor...?

Choice 1 - do not respond.

Choice 2 - respond but nicely.

I chose Choice 2 - I wrote "That
was a joke. :)"

If I hadn't included the smile,
it would have been insulting...
it would have been extremely rude
to say, "I thought you said you had
a sense of humor...!!!" I would
never say something like that, and
I trust you wouldn't either!!

What SHOULD you say about your
sense of humor in your profile?

Apparently it's like having all
your immunizations. You almost HAVE
TO mention it, like a requirement.

Some men may think that if you don't
say that you have a sense of humor,
then you must not have one. (A guy
like that is probably not your
mental equal... move on to the
next guy if they take things too
literally! And many men do!)

So it's a good idea to mention that
you have a sense of humor. But here's
an important caution for men and
women:

Don't ever try to "prove" that you have
a sense of humor by making a "joke" in
your profile, because this usually
backfires

For example, I was reading a man's
profile that sounded pretty good.

Of course, the guy said he had
a sense of humor. (No, really??)

Then near the end of a lengthy
paragraph or two, he said, "I'm
here because my blow-up doll is
out of order. I just wanted to
see who actually is still reading
this far."

UGH - that's a sense of humor?
That's more like a dealbreaker,
"humor" or not. YUK. This is a man
who does not understand the first
thing about women and who therefore
probably needs a plastic ladyfriend,
so NEXT... anyone who did read that
far was SO glad she did!!

That's a VERY good example of
trying to display a "sense of
humor" and having it "blow up"
on you.

Humor is something that will show
up in your interactions very
soon once you start talking. So
there's no sense trying to
PROVE that you have a sense of
humor in your profile!! Humor
is highly personal and individual
anyway - and jokes can be easily
misunderstood - as my own
experience certainly showed
when I made a joke - or thought
I did - to one of the thousands
of men who have a "great sense
of humor"!

Online dating DOES work! But don't
go into it without knowing how
it works.

Click Here to discover how to have 7 Dates or more this month with attractive women

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Boldly Flirt with a Girl with Text Messaging

The great thing about flirting with text messages is you can really put some thought into your texts and replies. You are not face to face having to be quick witted. It doesn't matter what you are wearing or if you have even had a shower and shave. She won't know, all she has to know is how you can make her feel with your texts. When you flirt with a text message, you want to push her emotional buttons and get her hooked. This is done through teasing.

Stop wasting your time sending her all those compliments. Yes they are nice, and we often think they are sweet, but they are not what builds up the sexual tension and initial attraction. If you are going to flirt with girl by a text, tease her. Girls like to be teased. Think back to the days on the playground. We would pretend to get all mad, but really we were loving it when you pulled our pigtails. When texting a girl, think grade school.

So if you are going to flirt with a text message, tease her, pick at her. Use something like an inside joke that you share. Pick at her about a habit she has. Tell her she is such a bad girl. Be a bit naughty but not distasteful. Don't be shy, be bold. Girls love bold confident guys. Flirting with text messages should be fun and upbeat, not serious and boring.

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Another teasing technique in texting girls is to wait to reply. Don't give her an answer right away. Let her hang there a little while. She starts to wonder are you going to reply and just when she is getting frustrated, you come through. She feels relief and this creates a trigger in her. Do it a few times and she will start to associate your replies with a sense of relief. Like Pavlov's dog sort of. Train her emotions with your flirty texts. There is way more to it than the words you send when you want to flirt with a girl via texting.

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Do you really know what you are doing when you text a girl? Do you see it as keeping in touch or do recognize it for the huge tool it is? Learn how to flirt like crazy with girls by text messaging. Click Here to get over 101 proven flirty text messages

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Online Profile Tips for Men

First of the dating profile tips for men would be no negatives. We don't want to hear about how bad you were treated by the women before us. This tells us you have some serious baggage and chances are good you are not over the "ex" yet. We assume you don't want to play games, so why put that in your profile? That really is a no brainer. Seriously have you ever seen an online dating profile that said, "I love to play games"?

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Second of the dating profile tips for men would be cut all the crap about how honest, warm, loving sincere, loyal and wonderful you are. Honestly almost every profile says this and it gets quite mundane. We have read that so much that we just skip over the part hoping that somewhere in the next paragraph you will have say something interesting.

Third of the dating profile tips for men would be leave out your cars, boats, motorcycles and airplanes. Materialistic are you? Such a turn off. Who cares? If women are responding to you because of your worldly possessions, really is that what you want? Also, please leave your shirt on, leave something for our imagination, we are not the visually stimulated creatures that you are. We connect on an emotional level.

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So what's left, we don't want your baggage, we don't want your wonderful qualities nor your material possessions, so what do we want. We want humor, and interesting. We don't mind knowing your taste in music and maybe what you like to do for fun. We want to know are you stable or maybe a bit on the wild side. What we want is a glimpse of your personality. Not some superficial words.

Click Here to discover how to have 7 Dates or more this month with attractive women

Women are now approaching men more and more on dating sites making that first move. The picture helps, but when it comes to online dating, it's the profile we pay attention to. I might be doing a search and run across a divine hunk, but if his profile is lame, well I go next. Your profile is your first impression, don't blow it.
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Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Making a First Impression on a Dating Site

The first impression is critical. Your picture is important. Make sure it is a close up and it is clear. If you choose to add other pictures to your profile, consider adding ones where you are doing something you enjoy. No pictures of pets, landscape scenes or other women, regardless if it's you daughter, mother or aunt. Women are turned off by pictures of you with other women. One of the best tips for internet dating for men is have a picture. A close up and one full body is best. Also, please remeber we women are not as visually stimulated as you men are. We would prefer you keep your shirt on for now. We really do find that shallow and tacky.

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Your words in your profile are very important. It would not help to do a reverse search and view the profiles of other men. By seeing profiles of other men you can get a good idea how to stand out above the others. 98% of male profiles start out with something like how honest, loving, sincere, hardworking and so on and so forth a man is. As opposed to what? Dishonest, hateful, deceitful and lazy? These qualities do not need to be pointed out. Your personality should shine in your online profile. She should be motivated by your words to learn more about you. Women are going to assume you are all of those thing, we sure hope so.

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That first email is critical. I am a woman active on a dating site and I can't tell you how many times I find myself rolling my eyes. A lot of men either send something lame like "Ya wanna chat?", or "How are you", or even a lame "hi". This does nothing for me or any other woman for that matter. Then there are the men that enter our inboxes trying to sell themselves. I am this and I am that. I will treat you like a Queen. I will give you massages and candlelit dinners. Please spare us, we are not buying a car. We are looking for creative interesting men. Are you out there? A male online profile should pique our interest, not bore us to tears.

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Online dating sites really are a great way to meet women. It is different than meeting in person. You have to relay a lot through words and there is no voice in the beginning or visual stimulus. Be careful with your words, it's easy to misinterpret them online. That means one thing, it is up to you and the words you choose to make an impression and create an attraction. The goal is to get the woman inspired and create a desire in her to meet you.

Click Here to discover how to have 7 Dates or more this month with attractive women